Thursday, March 18, 2010

Praise...even in the trials?

Psalm 34:1 -I will extol the LORD at all times; his praise will always be on my lips.

The psalmist's resolve is to praise God in every situation and under every circumstance. Is this verse, David is giving praise to God for protection and deliverance from his enemies.

Do you praise Him during times of trial as well as times of deliverance?

This was in my inbox this morning from the daily Bible verse that I receive. The funny thing is as I go through this time that I'm struggling I really feel like it's all for the best. I know that the struggle is of my own making, I knew that what I was doing would lead to some hurt in the long run no matter how long it went on. But as I look at where I am today, I can see the good that came out of this.

See I knew for some time that my relationship with God was slipping, I don't think anyone else knew, in fact I'm almost positive of that. But my quite times were not as they should have been and most times not at all. I spent no time studying my Bible, no real time praying. I felt disconnected from God in a lot of ways.

Now I am MAKING time to draw close to Him, to lean on Him, to SEEK His face. I know that largely is because I need His strength more than ever right now. But my goodness it is so wonderful to do these things. Now don't get me wrong, I still have evenings even now where I think to myself I just want to go to bed, I can skip this and make it up tomorrow. But knowing where I was I'm in some ways forcing myself to follow through no matter what. And that is helping me, more than I think I realize at times.

Last night I was hurting. And after I finished my Bible reading and crying out to God (which is EXACTLY what it was) I wrote the following (plus a little more that I'm not going to add on here, in case it seems a little off, that's why).

Sometimes feel like I'm going crazy. My thoughts are jumbled, my heart's constricted. I didn't want to admit the feelings. Now I can't help but admit them. With tears shed the truth is uttered. But don't worry; those words are now only spoken between me and God. He knows and in that there is safety. I will prevail, with God's help over this. One day my heart will be healed fully again. And one day I will be much better. I won't lie to you if you ask how I am, but I won't share all the things I now recognize in me, things that were there that I held back. And that's ok because you don't need to know.
This is the right thing.

I cannot help but say again how thankful I am that we serve a God that loves us so much that He extends His grace to us in all these things. That all we have to do is ask for forgiveness, for comfort (and let's face it most of the time we don't have to ask for that), for love. And He freely gives it just like a true loving Father would.

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